A Life Free From Care

“ We are devoured by care- care about our job, care about our life of prayer, care about how we are getting on, care about what other people are doing, care about this, care about that- we are devoured by it. And then the thoughts, “fears, reflections, regrets, anxieties,” this constant business…” (Thomas Merton, A Life Free From Care)

A few years ago I remember sitting in my elective religion class at John Carroll- Thomas Merton and Dorothy Day. We were reading Thomas Merton’s text “A Life Free From Care”. I have a distinctive memory of reading this title and thinking Merton you are a crazy person! Life is not free from care. At the time I was taking 18 credit hours, had an internship, service activities and was a teacher assistant (TA) for a psychology course. I knew I was in over my head, but I just kept adding on to my to do list. I was the yes person and everyone knew they could depend on me to be there to help.

Three years later this quotation still makes me stop and reflect on my life. My day still feels like a constant juggling act in which I am trying to balance family, friends, my own needs, service, spiritual life, applying to Graduate school and everything in between. Sometimes I find myself wondering if I am taking on too much. I quickly brush this thought aside and keep moving. I’ve realized that everyday I’m working, working, working and when I stop to take a breath I sometimes question if this is the life that God has in mind for me.

Last week I stumbled upon this youtube video from my Thomas Merton class: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjIu7AjOSBQ. In the Rob Bell movie Nooma discussed how people walk around aimlessly everyday saying that they are so busy with life just passing them by. He asks if this is much of a life. God gives us one or a few God given talents in which we should focus our energy. Bell says that being busy is a drug today that people are addicted to hide from themselves. Yet, we need to focus to the will of one thing. Sometimes the enemy is the good for we will have no energy left to focus on the one thing. It’s okay to say no because you’ve already said yes.

I believe this is a message that is relevant to all of us as volunteers. In the busy work environments that we are in it is so easy to want to say yes, but sometimes we must say no. For me I’m working to remind myself that everyday life should be liberating to me versus a constant to-do-list. This is a challenge I am trying to work through this year. I hope everyone has a nice week!

<3 Tina